


this is why google was invented

by nox_noctis



Series: professor katsuki yuuri, phD [1]
Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Post-Canon, Retirement AU, Viktor is extra, With A Twist, Yuuri is oblivious, attempts at comedy, skygemspeaks retirement au, yuuri is a professor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-07
Updated: 2019-07-07
Packaged: 2020-06-24 04:44:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,810
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19716457
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nox_noctis/pseuds/nox_noctis
Summary: Welcome to Psych 101 with Professor Katsuki!Did he also mention that he’s a world renound figure skater?In which Yuuri goes back to school to get his doctorate in psychology, ends up teaching,and somehow none of his students bother to ask him about his career history.





	this is why google was invented

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SkyGem](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SkyGem/gifts).



> guess who should be preparing for junior year and studying for the PSAT? this bitch.
> 
> guess who is staying up till 1am to write fanfic? also this bitch
> 
> aka i finally got around to reading [skygemspeaks](https://skygemspeaks.tumblr.com/post/156733406313/okay-but-imagine-yuuri-retires-from-competitive) retirement au and my hand slipped. repeatedly. i also took some artistic liberties here and modified it slightly, so please enjoy!
> 
> [tumblr](https://sailingthestars.tumblr.com)  
> [submit a request](https://goo.gl/forms/1Gqz4QPADhiHa55A3)  
> 

When Professor Katsuki’s students walked into his Introduction to Psychology class on the first day of school, they never expected the surprisingly sweet and soft Japanese man clad in blue-framed glasses and a matching cardigan. 

It seemed as though Dr. Katsuki, or Yuuri as he insisted on being called, was an oblivious heartbreaker. Men, women, and nonbinary people alike fell swiftly for his charms. He was simply the human personification of a cinnamon roll with sweet smiles and blushes. It also helped that he was, as the kids say, _thick_. It was obvious that Yuuri worked out, as evidenced by his well-defined forearms and thighs that could kill. He also was soft in just the right places, with curves to boot. It didn’t seem so weird for at least 60 percent of the class to have a crush on their professor because Yuuri was only in his late 20’s. He told his students he had gone for his doctorate after taking a break from education for a few years. Taking a break to do what, he never mentioned. 

He was charming and soft-spoken and spoke with conviction, reinforcing his knowledge of the topic. His classes were incredibly informative and made complex concepts somewhat digestible. He was also easily approachable and offered his office hours for anyone in need of a bit of extra help.

Those sessions became incredibly popular, due to the fact that A) Professor Katsuki was an excellent teacher and B) Anyone with working eyes could see that he was stunning. There was some speculation and dispute as to what the golden band was on Dr. Katsuki’s ring finger, but since it was worn on the right, it became a general consensus among the students that it was simply a fashion statement. Further observation later into the semester revealed that a good three-quarters of Katsuki’s wardrobe was brand name and much more expensive than a teachers salary could afford. It was chalked up to the possibility that Dr. Katsuki was incredibly good at thrifting and had a sixth sense for extremely costly clothing.

He often brought in homemade snacks for his office hours. People were unsurprised to find things like Yakitori and Kashipan, dishes from his native culture, but his tastes also broadened to Russian and Thai cuisine. Tupperwares full of Pirozhki were a common staple on his desk. 

Eventually, these office sessions became too crowded, with a line of students streaming outside the door to his office, so Dr. Katsuki decided to move them all to a nearby cafe on campus, with a bag full of tupperwares holding homemade treats towed along.

They met regularly on Friday afternoons, which in many students opinions made it an even better day. 

These sessions were lighthearted and fun and gave Professor Katsuki an opportunity to get to know his students and give them individual assistance. Some, he noticed, seemed to have an excellent grasp of the concepts, but seemed to show up anyways. 

Well, the more the merrier. 

*

In the middle of a lecture about the different types and presentations of depression, Prof. Katsuki’s phone rang. He was always sure to silence it before class, but still it blared with a rendition of Britney Spears’s “Oops I Did It Again”. He blushed and apologized to his class.

“Sorry guys, this is important!”

He grabbed the mobile to answer it, caller ID flashing on the screen. To the eagle-eyed observer, “✧･ﾟ: ･ﾟVitya ･ﾟ: ･✧” could be spotted on the screen. He raised the phone to his ear and proceeded to speak.

“Viktor, you know I’m in class.”

The students could hear garbled, rapid speech coming from the other end of the line. 

Much to the shock of the students, Dr. Katsuki broke out in Slavic language, seemingly fluent.

Incredulous glances were shared across the lecture hall.

A few whispers of “Why is he fluent in Russian?” and “What the fuck?!” could be heard.

After the conversation finished, Yuuri spoke again with an apologetic tone. 

“Sorry, everyone! There’s a bit of a family emergency and I have to leave. Consider class dismissed.”

He hurried out of the classroom, only stopping to quickly collect and deposit the papers on his desk into his messenger bag and then proceeding to throw it onto his shoulder before the class even had a chance to blink. 

The students looked around the hall in shock, but an early dismissal was something that always had to be appreciated and they quickly vacated without much circumstance. 

*

The next time the class met, Yuuri opened the class with an apology. 

“Sorry for my swift disappearance last class. The husband had a bit of an accident and had to be taken to the hospital to be checked out. He’s fine now and happily drugged up at home on morphine.”

It seemed as if the students in Psych 101 were doomed to have heart attack after heart attack.

For the second time in a week, shocked glances swept across the room.

“The husband?” one student whispered to the girl sitting next to her. “Since when has Dr. Katsuki been _married_?”

In another section, someone bravely piped up.

“Professor Katsuki, why don’t you wear your ring on your left hand?”

The student in question quickly sat back down, exhilarated. 

Yuuri chuckled and smiled, “Oh! My husband is Russian. They usually wear their rings on the right hand.”

Several people groaned internally. _How could I be so stupid? Of course, it’s not a fashion statement. Dr. Katsuki doesn’t seem the type to accessorize and he doesn’t wear any other jewelry!_

On the other side of the lecture hall, several hearts had been shattered. _Of course, Dr. Katsuki was married. How could I have been so oblivious? He’s so wonderful that someone must have snatched him up early in the game._

Yuuri continued on with the lecture, although a good majority of the class were shell-shocked at the revelation that their wonderful, cinnamon roll of a professor was married. 

*

It only continued from there.

Yuuri occasionally made references to his break from academia or how his husband was going to Spain for some sort of competition. What kind of competition, nobody knew, but nobody dared to ask. 

A few students from Yuuri’s class had met up to discuss the enigma that was Katsuki Yuuri. 

Rachel, Max, and Corey sat on the floor of Isabella’s dorm room. 

“He’s just so sweet!” Max exclaimed. “Did you hear he let Sammy borrow his phone because his died? Apparently, he has this super adorable poodle! It’s his home screen and his phone case even has poodles too!”

Damn, they all through to themselves. Yuuri was so much better than any stodgy old professor could ever be.

*

It was Friday afternoon and a large group of students had traipsed into the cafe, waiting for Professor Katsuki’s office hours to begin. 

Yuuri walked in, the door jangling behind him.

“Hi, everyone! I brought piroshky at the request of the husband. He might be stopping by later, so be on the lookout for a Russian guy with silver hair.”

Immediately, all the students stopped what they had been doing to consider what Professor Katsuki was saying.

“Silver hair?” one girl named Alex questioned, “Is Yuuri married to some old dude?”

Before anyone had much of a chance to process, the door slammed open.

On the other side of it was a tiny, but very angry blonde. 

The boy strode over towards Yuuri, clad in a tiger print jacket and combat boots. He was the very opposite of Dr. Katsuki. 

“Oi, Katsudon!”

Yuuri looked up from where he was helping a student. 

“Oh, Yuri!” Dr. Katsuki exclaimed, smiling. 

All of the class looked up.

Two Yuuris? Was this some sort of alternate universe where their cinnamon roll professor had transformed into a miniature blonde Russian with an attitude to make up for his lack of height.

How did Professor Katsuki know this kid?

Why was the kid now talking about some person named Viktor and a rink?

A girl sitting across the cafe squealed.

Yuri —the other one— bristled obviously in surprise.

Yuuri laughed to himself before gently prodding Yuri. 

“Yurio, be nice and take a picture with our fans.”

Yurio (Yuri?) turned around in reluctance.

‘Oh my god!” the girl shrieked again “You’re Yuri Plisetsky! Will you take a picture with us?”

The blonde looked rather miffed and smiled curtly in acknowledgment. 

“Sure, it’s no problem.”

All of the students stared at the two Yuris and the seemingly growing horde of what must be fangirls that piled through the door.

The brandished phones, gel pens, and deafening screams were telltale. 

The group of students watched as the girls pulled out pens and papers, Yuuri and the kid—the other Yuuri?—signed autographs and took selfies. The blond lost his anger, smiling at the girls and asking for their Instagrams to tag them.

The girls stammered out thanks and apologized for taking their time— _Thank you so much! Sorry for bothering you! And we can’t wait to see your next performance, Yurochka!_ —hurrying out of the cafe, whispering excitedly to each other.

“What the hell?!” a chorus of students demanded.

“How do they know you?”

The blonde gave them a flat look. “Everyone knows Katsudon.”

“What the hell?” repeated a good majority of the class.

“And those were my fans, Katsudon. They liked me more.”

“Sure, Yurio,” Yuuri appeased.

“They were,” the blonde insisted. “I checked their Instagrams. They’re Angels.”

“Well, it was nice of you to take pictures with your Angels.”

“No, seriously,” Alex piped up. “What just happened?”

“Are you blind?” The kid—Yurio? Yurochka?—demanded. “They were fans.”

“But you’re not famous!” Max exclaimed.

The kid went back to staring at them like they were unworthy of his gaze and then turned to Yuuri.

“Viktor sent me to try and reach you. Apparently, you turned your phone off and he’s wondering what you want for dinner.”

Isabella was shocked. _What kind of husband sends an in-person liaison to ask what your partner wants for dinner?”_

Apparently, it was Yuuri’s husband who took the perfect opportunity to come sailing through the door calling “YUUUURI” and wrap Dr. Katsuki in a hug. 

Yuuri jumped a bit at the surprise but smiled as soon as he recognized the man. 

“I tried to call you”, the silver-haired man whined, “but you didn’t pick up. So I sent Yurio instead but I didn’t hear back from him so I decided to come myself!” He said the last bit cheerfully with a sunny smile on his face as though the best part of his day was tracking down his husband to a cafe to ask him what he wanted for dinner.

The entire class started incredulously, mouths agape.

_Was this the silver-haired Russian husband (?) Dr. Katsuki was talking about?_

_Well, he’s obviously not old._

Yuuri’s husband (?) _had_ to be God himself or at least a model. He was tall, with beautiful azure eyes and a heart-shaped smile. His silver bangs covered one eye and he used the other to wink at the class.

This guy was in Yuuri's league, and he is batting a thousand in it. 

Several students dropped to the ground, having fainted.

He wore perfectly tailored slacks and a buttondown, both name brand. A few of the students made the connection as to where Yuuri’s clothes and dress sense came from. 

Someone from one of the back tables spoke up again.

“Professor, what is going on and why are people asking for your autograph?”

Vikor took the opportunity to chime in, a grin on his face. He spoke with a slight lilting Russian accent. 

“Oh, didn’t Yuuri tell you? He’s one of the best figure skaters in the world.”

A few students who had been standing had to sit down in shock.

“My solnyshko right here is a two-time gold medalist at the Olympics and a four-time world champion! He also has a practical bucket of silvers and golds.”

Yuuri looked like he wanted to spontaneously combust.

“You’re one to talk”, Yuuri replies with slight humorous mirth. "Viktor here took first in every figure skating competition he was in for five straight years. He won gold at the Olympics twice. He’s unarguably the living legend of figure skating and a media darling"

Viktor’s heart-shaped grin turned down slightly.

“Yuuri tends to understate his achievements. I wish he wouldn’t. He’s just so amazing! So many accomplishments on and off the ice. And he’s so smart too!”

Yuuri blushed even more, practically transforming into a tomato. He buried his face in his hands and Viktor pulled him closer. 

Viktor addressed the crowd.

“Everyone, drinks are on me. Please get whatever you like. You all have worked so hard and I know Yuuri is a demanding teacher.”

The room was shocked. Drinks for a good 40 people? That’s got to be expensive. 

Well, apparently since their Professor and his husband were apparently living legends and Olympians with sponsorship funds to spare, it couldn’t hurt.

It was a cheerful atmosphere as afternoon blended into evening and spirits were high.

Yuuri and Viktor excused themselves to go home with Yurio in tow, but the majority of the class stayed to confirm with each other that what had just transpired was not a mass hallucination.

*

A week later Corey, Isabella, Max, and Rachel met up again. 

“Holy shit! Were you there when Dr. Katsuki’s son and husband came to office hours? Can you believe he never told us that he’s a fucking Olympian!”

Max pulled out his computer and opened Google.

He stared down at the screen like he was about to hack into the CIA, not Google his adorable and apparently world-renowned psych professor. 

Max quickly typed “Yuuri Katsuki” into the search bar.

The first result was an extensive Wikipedia page for one Katsuki Yuuri. He couldn’t believe that it was his shy professor.

He clicked on the link to open the page and was bombarded by medals and achievements apparently attained by none other than Professor Katsuki himself.

_“Dr. Katsuki Yuuri (born November 29th, 1992) was a competitive men's singles figure skater representing Japan. He was accomplished on the international circuit, competing from the age of 18 and retiring at the age of 26. His most notable accomplishments as of 2019 include taking gold medals at two different Olympics, being the four-time world champion in mens singles figure skating, and the handful of golds and silvers from various international events. He holds the world record for highest Free Skate score, achieved while competing at Barcelona Grand Prix final in 2016. After attaining his masters in Psychology at Wayne State University in Detriot, Michigan, Katsuki went on to pursue his doctorate which he successfully attained. He became engaged to fellow figure skater and five-time World Champion representing Russia, Viktor Nikiforov at the 2016 Grand Prix. Katsuki recently married Nikiforov at a small, private ceremony in Hatsetsu, Japan, Katsuki’s birthplace. He currently resides in with his husband and their dog where Katsuki teaches psychology and Nikiforov coaches their adopted son and student, Yuri Plisetsky.”_

Max just about had an aneurysm right then and there. 

He continued to scroll down the page, finding more gems including Yuuri’s _On Love: Eros_ routine and the _Aria: Stammi Vicino_ pair skate that Yuuri had shared with the silver-haired man and Professor Katsuki’s husband who had come to the cafe during Dr. Katsuki’s office hours. 

Corey, Rachel, and Isabella had been peering over his shoulder, reading the Wikipedia page at the same time Max did. 

Corey hoped with all his poor, gay heart that he would find a love as perfect as Dr. Katsuki and the mysterious Viktor. 

Rachel thanked God for the wonderful mystery that was their Psychology teacher.

Isabella was face-down on the floor, brain apparently fried from the overload of information about their unassuming professor. 

Their cinnamon roll teacher had turned out to be not only a doctor of psychology but also an Olympian, World Champion, and had somehow scored himself a husband that was practically a God.

If only someone had asked what Professor Katsuki did prior to teaching, they wouldn’t be in this mess in the first place. 

*

After that life-changing Friday afternoon in the cafe, class continued as normal.

Occasionally Yuri would sit in or Viktor would pop by to interrupt the whole class to give Yuuri a hug. Everyone thought it was deserved so there were no complaints. Every so often, classes would be canceled so that Yuuri could go support his husband and son at the competitions he used to take part in or for an interview to take place. 

Once the year was up, all of the students were sad to say goodbye to their wonderful professor. What would be missed most especially was Friday afternoon office hours, as the most exciting things seemed to transpire. 

**Author's Note:**

> i’m fully under the impression that viktor’s accident was because he ran to pet a dog, tripped, and sprained his ankle. a martyr for dog lovers everywhere. 
> 
> thanks for reading!
> 
> [tumblr](https://sailingthestars.tumblr.com)  
> [submit a request](https://goo.gl/forms/1Gqz4QPADhiHa55A3)  
> 


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